How To Survive Grief

Today, I'm talking about grief. 

It isn't joyful nor comfortable, yet it's part of life and our human condition.

The term can be applied to many other events than death (loss of a job, end of a relationship, loss of health, a period of our life...)

Every time we have a major change in our lives, it can trigger a feeling of grief. 

Here I'll be talking specifically about the loss of a loved one.

Several people around me have recently lost someone they were cherishing.

I've had the honor to support some of them, on a professional or personal level.

And I've noticed that there was a lack of knowledge or tools available for those grieving and the people around them.

According to my experience, the bereaved often feel obligated to "move forward", sometimes even pretending feeling better
because it's what the people around them and the society expect from them. 

One of the primary needs for those in need is to see their pain be seen and recognized by the other.

However in our modern cultures, there're less and less opportunities for the bereaved to have their pain being witnessed  
and this can turn into a feeling of isolation and loneliness. 

There really is no rule on the duration of the grief process.
 
and I'm not sure there's even a beginning, a middle and an end to that process. 

Grief might look and feel different over time, and doesn't have be painful forever.

Grief is the container that holds all of the emotions felt as a result of loss.

It could be fear, anger, sadness, confusion, guilt, but also gratitude, relief, hope. 

We can feel any combination of emotions inside of grief, and all of them are OK.

Grief and love are just the two sides of the same coin. 

Anyone who has fully experienced love once in their life has or will experience grief one day. 

It's crucial to fully embrace the emotions present for what they are.

Unfortunately very few of us have learnt how to truly feel our emotions. 

Our society has placed the emphasis on the thinking and doing and discredited the very notion of feeling. 

It's yet one of the central pillars of our mental, physical and spiritual well-being.

Instead, many of us are fearing our emotions and have learnt to divert their attention from them with food, Netflix or shopping. 

One of the key to building resilience and inner strength is learning how to feel our emotions until it passes, how uncomfortable it is. 

This is the only way to healthily process our emotions,  

And there, lies the process of healing.

Leave a comment if you'd like to share your own experience or have question, I love hearing back from you,